The Power of “I Don’t Know”

A Pathway to Knowledge or a Self-Created Pit of Apathy

“I don’t know”, this response (because it is not an answer) can either open you up to understanding and growth or can allow you to take no responsibility and stay in chosen ignorance. Regardless of which, if this is your current response then take the time to learn what the answer is, do not allow yourself to be okay with “I don’t know”.

Exposed Vulnerability

Some find admitting a lack of knowledge or understanding exposes one’s own vulnerability which can be uncomfortable. However, acting like you know something when you don’t only holds you back from an opportunity to increase your own knowledge by learning something new.

I was born not knowing and have had only a little time to change that here and there. - Richard P. Feynman

No one was born all knowing, everyone gains knowledge as they grow and experience life so expecting oneself to miraculously know everything is just ludicrous! Don’t try and make up some random guess of an answer if you truly do not know the answer. Step up, be confident in you lack of knowledge, but do not be comfortable in staying in ignorance. If you have the opportunity to learn then take that opportunity, use your time here to increase your knowledge by accepting your lack of it. The path to true wisdom is learning what you don’t already know.

Blissful Ignorance

Then there are the times where you admit not knowing the answer thus justifying your behavior because of your lack of knowledge. You then CHOOSE to stay in blissful ignorance because it ALLOWS you to keep doing what you’re doing without taking responsibility…because you didn’t know any better. This is particularly true when it comes to introspection.

Ninety per cent of the world's woe comes from people not knowing themselves, their abilities, their frailties, and even their real virtues. Most of us go almost all the way through life as complete strangers to ourselves - so how can we know anyone else? Sydney J. Harris

When it comes to looking inward, looking at our choices, figuring out why we are doing what we are is when it all gets too easy to take the road of “I don’t know” and stay on that path. Who wants to really figure out: why you’re eating chocolates out of the bag in the pantry, why you can’t seem to find just 10 minutes to move your body, why you stop at the same bar after work instead of spending time with your family, why you’re unable to put your resume together even though you’re miserable at your current job or why you’re hanging onto a detrimental relationship? Your stomach probably got a little uneasy just reading these questions, and that fear (it is fear make no mistake about it) is why you’re willing to stay along the same ignorant path. YOU CAN NOT accept “I don’t know” as your only response when you’re making decisions that do not align with your true virtues, that are keeping you from increasing your own happiness and accomplishing the goals you’ve set forth.

Get Curious

In either of these situations it’s best to get curious, be inquisitive and take the path towards understanding. If you’re living a healthier lifestyle but you’re still making choices (sometimes unconscious) that are derailing that healthy lifestyle then it is your duty and responsibility to figure out why. My suggestion is to start journaling (OMG Liz you and the writing everything down again…really…YES REALLY) if you find yourself about to sit down at the table to read your book and then proceed to munch on Cheetos through the whole next chapter, stop what you’re doing and start writing it all down.

Example:

I’m at the kitchen table dying to find out what will happen next to Guinevere and Lancelot when miraculously the Cheetos have appeared on the table….I don’t even remember getting them out of the pantry. Why am I always getting the Cheetos yes I like them but I mean I hardly even taste them while I’m reading and the portion in the bowl is almost always gone before I realize it and I feel like I didn’t even taste any of them….so what’s the point, and am I even hungry….I ate lunch three hours ago and it’s not like I worked out or anything…..so why I am doing this...it might come from long study hours in college….but I’m not going to be here for six hours studying Invertebrate Zoology and I will be having dinner in like two hours….so maybe a cup of hot tea or some gum would be a better choice…that seemed to work the other day when I was making more of an effort to maintain my healthy eating habits.

Now a couple of things have happened here:

You’ve stopped an automatic response and brought awareness to it which is the first step in changing a habit

You’ve replaced the desire to eat mindlessly with journaling and by doing this the craving has subsided

You’ve reminded yourself of a previous success in the same situation

You’ve come up with an alternative plan of action

Once you start spending time getting curious about what you do not know you will automatically start building up your confidence in your abilities to handle a similar situation better in the future. Acting like you know something when you don’t just leaves you in ignorance, and choosing to stay in ignorance only weakens you. Like with most things, once you’re in the process, once you’ve committed to learning, your stress level will decrease because you are putting your energy into understanding and as GI Joe states “Knowing is half the battle”. The other half is using that knowledge there’s no more hiding then, you are now responsible for what you do and who really wouldn’t want to be responsible for their own life? So admit what you don’t know, get curious and own the truth.

Elizabeth SimmonsMarch 15, 2020Comment